Fear To Succeed or Lack of Self-Faith?
I am in a phase in my life where I am being tested in my relationship, friendships, and career. Things are not bad but I am a firm believer in continuous improvement; thus, I have been working on how I show up differently in all of these areas. I have always found comfort in growing through learning opportunities because I believe worldly tests make me stronger spiritually.
What I have come to realize is that I will not necessarily prompt or inflict all learning opportunities onto myself. There will be situations that arise where I am not directly involved however, I am directly impacted. In such situations, I ask myself, what is meant for me to learn from this, in this or through this?
Recently, I was asked to be an interim manager over employees that would normally be considered peers. Immediately, fear kicked in and I began to have self-doubting thoughts. As one of the youngest members on my team, my first reaction was why me? I called my husband and he said Courtney, you are showing a lack of self-faith. My first reaction was WHAT…… ME? Lack of faith in myself? NO WAY!! However, after I pondered on his comment, I realized his statement was true. If I had self-faith, I would have demonstrated confidence and trust in myself to perform this ask. However, initially, I was not confident that I would succeed.
Have you ever thought to yourself why am I doubting my abilities / capabilities? This is what I asked myself! I had to unpack the root of this doubt and identify what was needed for me to move forward. In unpacking my doubt, I realized that my fear did not come from the thought I wouldn’t succeed, it was the fear of being rejected by those involved. When I prayed about this test, my spirit told me to let God use this learning opportunity to show me my weaknesses. In doing so, I have had the opportunity to ask God for strength in these areas to help grow my faith.
Upon accepting this opportunity, I knew I had to overcome the reservations I had with being a business leader. I had to examine my strengths, limitations and the reality of the situation honestly. In doing so, I realized that I GOT THIS!
How I have had success in this process is by reiterating the below statements to myself:
- I understand that no amount of training or education can prepare me for every management scenario I will encounter.
- My development as a business leader will come at the hand of my personal experience.
- More than likely I will make mistakes, but that’s’ how I learn.
- If I am fair to those that have experiences with me, they will respect me.
- If I am willing to learn, willing to be humble and transparent, there is really nothing to be afraid of.
Ask yourself the following question and write down what you are going to learn / grow through next!
Am I fearful to succeed or do I have a lack of faith in myself?